And now for something completely different...

Goldie Bear and the 3 Humans

From "Everybear's Compendium of Furry Tales"    

Once upon a time, there was a small bear cub named Goldie.  Her parents named her that because of her light, golden fur.  They were very proud of her and, well, they spoiled her a bit.  She was a very pretty cub, and was the envy of all the other cubs in the forest.  She was a sensible cub though, and tried not to be too haughty or proud with her friends.  But as an only cub, she did have a lot of time alone when her parents were out foraging for food, like honey, salmon, and other nice things bears like to eat. 

One day, when her parents were out gathering food, Goldie decided she wanted to go out too, instead of staying at home and help prepare the cave for hibernation season which was really boring.  So off she went, strolling through the forest on a little-used path, just to see where it took her. 

It was a warm late summer morning, and the sun shone brightly through the forest canopy, giving a green and gold lustre to the world, with gentle shadows providing some cool shade under the larger trees.  The path was narrow, winding its way through the forest giants.  After yet another turn of the path, Goldie was surprised to walk into an open meadow, covered with flowers and clover, with a large cabin right in the middle of it. 

"Hmmm," she thought, "I wonder what is in that cabin.  Maybe I could find something nice to eat." 

So being young, carefree, and not thinking of consequences, Goldie ambled up to the cabin to see if she could look in, and maybe, even get in. 

She walked around the cabin, careful not to stand on the flowers in the beds around the walls, and peered into the windows.  It was a very tidy cabin with large furniture and even one of those boxes that showed pictures she remembered her uncle Rufus telling her about.  Then she came to the kitchen, and there she saw three dishes full of -- wow!  Salmon steaks with bread and honey! 

Her nose quivered in anticipation, but then she thought, "Oh, this is a human house.  They don't like bears much.  I wonder if they are around anywhere."  So she took another careful, quiet talk around the cabin, and saw that there were no humans around at all.  They must have gone away for walk or something.  And then she noticed that the kitchen door was left just a bit open.  Aha!  Goldie wondered if she could get away with just a nibble or two of one of those delicious looking meals. 

Temptation was too much.  She nuzzled the door open with her nose and walked into the kitchen, which smelled of freshly cooked salmon, with just a waft of honey on the fresh bread.  She went up to the first plate, sniffed and took a tentative nibble.  Ouch!  It was way too hot, burning the tip of her tongue.  "Well, this requires further investigation," she said to herself. 

She sampled the second plate.  Way too cool, with the salmon flavour nearly gone.  "Bleah.  Too cold for me," she said. 

She tried the third plate.  Oooh, just right!  And without thinking, about it, she ate everything on the plate! 

Well, that was filling, and after such a good meal and the walk before, she felt a bit sleepy.  She walked through the house and saw there were three camp beds made up.  They looked very comfortable.  She tried the first one.  Ugh, lumpy and not comfortable at all.  She tried the second one, and nearly sank into the floor because that bed was way too soft.  So she tried the third bed and it was just right for a cub of her size and weight, and so she curled up and was asleep in two breaths. 

A while later, three humans walked toward their cabin, with baskets of fresh berries they had been picking for their breakfast, to go with the freshly caught salmon and baked bread.  There was the big male human, who wore a checked shirt , tough denim trousers and stout hiking boots.  The female human was a bit shorter, and I suppose, nice enough looking for a human lady.  She wore a light tan blouse with blue denim shorts and sandals.  And the third human was a little girl, who wore a little girl dress and shoes. 

They got to the kitchen door.  "Oh oh," said the man, "we left the kitchen door open again. I hope none of those pesky bears got in." 

"Oh look!" said the lady. "Something has been here, look at the bites out of our breakfasts!" 

"Yeah, and something has eaten all my breakfast too!" wailed the little girl. 

"This calls for serious action!" said the man, as we went into the other room to grab his rifle.  "Ain't no critter gonna rob our food again!" 

They all strode into the other room and the lady noticed that the camp beds were all mussed.  And the little girl shouted "Oh, here's the thief!  It's a bear cub!" 

That girl's shriek woke up Goldie with a start.  She  look around and saw three stern faced humans looking at her, with the big man holding a rifle.  She was in for it.  She gulped and slowly slid off the little girl's bed, with the main slowly lifting the rifle.  Things did not look good. 

The lady put a hand on the man's arm.  "Now, Bruce, don't be too hasty.  It's just a bear cub, and if you hurt her, her mother won't be very far away." 

"Yep, you're right," he said.  "Let's just shoo her out of here.  And he raised his arms and let out a bellow "Aaraarrrggh!  Fresh bear for breakfast!" he shouted. 

Goldie was well and truly panicked at this point, and scurried out the kitchen door as fast as she could, and didn't stop running until she reached her home cave.  Her parents had returned with a freshly caught salmon and a whole honeycomb. 

"Look what we have for you, Goldie dear," said the mother bear. 

"Um, no thanks, mom, I'm not really very hungry now", said Goldie, as she slunk off into cave. 

"I wonder what's got into her?" asked the mother bear. 

"No telling with little bear cubs" said the father bear. 

                                                #The End#